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A lot of things go unquestioned,
a lot of questions go unanswered,
a lot of words go unsaid,
a few go unheard,
some dreams are buried alive,
some are born dead…
That is Life…
More than unanswered questions,
there are unquestioned answers...
more than words unsaid,
There are moments unheard of ..
With a few dreams buried alive,
There are many more born right next to the stars…
That will always make you look up and smile ..
Now that is life... LIVE IT !!!
Letting go .... one of the biggest decisions in life .. You wish well.. but at the same time .. you donot want to be a part of the "missing-comittee" and sit in a corner and just miss and feel miserable... But then moving on in life is also essential... Khushbu Shah... Joined hungama on 30th April 2007. A part of my team as a Sr. Copywriter... Moving on ..she becamean integral partof my team and me .. Last night working on a presentation.. i realised, that any presentation to be made beyond this day , will have to be me alone. She will not be there to tell me , that this colour doesn't go Neha, Is it not too much text, Is this exactly what you want to say ?.. N blah blah... (ya, she actually says like too many things... But then we also make like awesome presentations...) There is so much that i have learnt from her.. there is so much that we have done together, there have been so many times when we have actually complimented each other's abilities, There has been so much understanding, there has always been so much unsaid.. n understood with the eyes...Am i sounding desperate ????? kind of ya i am ... I don want my best team member to move on... (Even though, her moving on was a decision we made together)I was still new to Mumbai... Just could not relate to the city.. Did not even think that there never could exist something that would be worth liking... Then came khushbu .. with her positive attitude, amazing smile, loads n loads n loads of patience and so much of creativity. She added that spark to the team .. n also to my Friend-deprived life in Mumbai... She took me around.. to the city that i had closed myself to, introduced me to a new world of books.. gave me gyan on how to work on my relationships... heard me through... text me in the middle of the night.. n told me not to cry... Read my expression written all over my face.. n asked me why? Stood by me profesionally, understanding most of the times, n explaining the rest... I will miss sitting next to her, finishing her dabba even before she realises, Poking her, pulling her cheeks, irritating her, dabaoing her legs (lol).. rather just being with her...My first friend in the city of strangers... My first friend who taught me patience.. My first friend who has never yelled back at me ... Another Arian in the league... but so different from the rest... Love u baby ... muah ... :)
Randomly surfing through channels last night, i caught on Pinjar ... (Urmila Matondkar, Manoj Bajpai & Sanjay Suri ). A movie that talked of the Independence and the pre independence era.. A time when women were loved, cared for but for some reason not respected enough. A time when even though Lillet Dube's elder daughter is getting married.. she herself is bearing a child... The movie took me back to another one that i had seen some time back with my family.. Khuda ke liye... A lovely movie from Pakistan, that talked about how each woman's opinion and right to speak her mind needs to be respected. Its not about movies, its about us .. the young women of India, born and brought up in the urban section of the society.. Young women, convent educated, with masteres from a few of the most renowned institutes, earning well, rather doing exceptionally well for their young ages. Yet somewhere, lost in a world, where they are addressed as 'aap' but still treated a noone. Where they are taught to say what their heart feels and believes, but not always allowed to do so. Have we actually become so urban for the ages to be accepted as those young docile daughters, who need to know how the world was back then, who need opinion, who need help.. but only to take their own decisions eventualy. All of it, only to decide how they want to live their lives in the years to come. Getting married is such an agenda at homes, but then how many of us can actually tell our moms, that we donot want to get married to this guy, because i don't think we could be physically compatible, because i cannot imagine myself sharing a bed with someone like him. How many of us want to say all this, or for that matter, how many times would our parents not get embarassed with all this or, just at the end say that it is another lame excuse of ours. I at times feel like putting in a reality check alarm in my mom dad's phones. That should almost everytime remind them, that their daughter has never had a drink in her life, not gone around experimenting bed time partners, never done drugs in life, Never done a financial ghapla, never been arrested in a crime, never killed anyone... nothing of such sort.. nothing... , Still knows how to maintain a house, still knows how to cook, Still loves being home with family, still reads good books, watches clean television, respects her parents, Prays everyday... Why is it that they for some reason donot want to see all of it...There are times when i want to sit with them and say all of it ... But then wonder 'should i' ??? Is it about convincing them or telling myself that i need to change ? Is it about them or yet again is it about me ? In my attempt to even out the gound to find some comfort, have i actually forgotten that wearing slippers might just make my journey easier???
How easy is it to hit those buttons on the keyboard, but does it happen the same way in real life? Do we live actually over the edge, where at the thought of getting rid of an event in life, Shift+Del does the needful?
Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind (2004, Jim Carry & Kate Winslet)
On a Valentine Day, Joel Barish feels the impulse of going to Montauk instead of working. After spending the cold day on the beach, he meets Clementine Kruczynski on the train station and they have a crush on each other. Joel and Clementine do not know that they were mates in the past. Joel has just erased Clementine from his memories when he found that Clementine did exactly the same, when their relationship ended. She had undergone a psychiatrist's experimental procedure in which all of her memory of Joel is removed, after the couple has tried for years to get their relationship working fluidly. Frustrated by the idea of still being in love with a woman who doesn't remember their time together, Joel agrees to undergo the procedure as well, to erase his memories of Clementine. However, along his erasing process, Joel becomes astonished when he finds that he still loves Clementine and he does not want to lose her, fighting for keeping the memories of their moments together instead.
www.imdb.com
How difficult is it to survive relationships? Who decides, that now its time to let go? Who takes the call that it won’t work anymore.. I thought ‘Euthanasia’ was illegal. Is my life and its dreams not as alive as my soul?
The ache is unbearable…
The pain somehow doesn’t seem to go …
The yearning just doesn’t end…
And the flow of tears just never gets slow…
I think of the time we kissed each other…
I think of the time I felt your breath..
The moments of your hand in mine…
All of it just rushes to my head…
I hush it all away … like everything else..
Those promises, those words…
The comforting smile, the tender hug …
The independent spirit that made us one...
All of it , Today somewhere lies in the dumps…
Have I become the deceiving lover,
The envious friend,
Or the disobeying daughter?
Is it inside me that I need to look…
Before i say ... that people around me have changed…
Is it me or is it them?
Or is it just the way I look at it today …
I feel so helpless.. I feel so defeated.. I feel so empty inside..
With no word , no whisper .. n nothing to hide..
I feel so naked without the caress,
Without your arms by my side…
Yet everyday I tell myself again..
Its without you that I need to survive…
Its every morning.. when I wakeup to the silence of my heart yelling inside…
Its every evening that I hit bed with my hollows inside waiting to get filled..
Its every moment that I say your name .. to remind myself you still exist…
Its every pain that makes me feel,.. that nothing was worse than letting you go …
I don want to be the defeated lover, the envious friend, or the disobeying daughter…
Yet I survive with my arms caressing me ..
Yet I survive, the silence inside…
It even scares me to think… how would it be ..
If this silence comes outside..
A new day, a new begining... a new journey, that my heart has so yearned for .. Nothing great happening though.. but yes a strong urge to make things happen... (umm.. that does not mean that i am making loads of effort for it).. But yes.. There is yet another urge to make things happen. Besides, i also have no clue, what is it that i wish, should happen (Ab main SRK thodi hoon... ke main thoda WISH karoon .. n it'll happen)
I sit with the same set of people in the same office.. I think i really need to log on to shine.com .
Matchmaker matchmaker, make me a match,
Find me a find,
Catch me a catch,
Matchmaker matchmaker, is he the one?
Is she the one?
Is there any company looking for me like that, as in actually?? Esp. the chairs in the TVC are too awesome.. (My company, trust me, has like really pathetic ones.)
So just that ek naukri ki talaash hai ...
Aur uske bgair haal behaal hai...
Boss ki shakal dekhne ka aage nahin koi khayaal hai...
Aage kuch nahin pata.. par kya Subhash Ghai ki picture Taal hai?
Might not be a very great topic to begin my blog with .. So wait kuch achcha sa aaj ya kal mein zaroor aa jaayega.. So it might just help ...
